The Discomfort Jump.
(#3 in a series of 5 or 6, I’m still working that out…)
How comfortable are you? Very, a lot, a little, not at all? As someone who craves certainty, I can tell you that I usually interpret discomfort as a sign that I am failing at something. At the logical level I know that’s not true, in fact it’s the opposite of what’s really going on.
However, at the emotional level, I’ve been conditioned that discomfort means I’m not doing something perfectly, which means I’m failing, and not worthy of being loved. I know that sounds crazy, but it’s true for a lot of people.
And it’s holding us back, because your relationship with discomfort will determine your destiny.
When you look back at anything in your life that really took work, were you good at it when you started? I doubt it. Unless you are one of those incredibly gifted people who could just do something difficult immediately, you had to fail many times at something to obtain any level of competency, let alone mastery.
Imagine if you were aware when you were trying to learn to walk. Would you have given up out of embarrassment?
Yet most of us walk. I think there’s a lesson in that.
Because in my life, there have been times when I have embraced the discomfort of doing something, and it’s turned out amazing. At 10,000 feet, a few minutes before I skydived out of a plane, I can tell you I was very uncomfortable. I was pretty much convinced I had lost my mind, yet that jump stands out as one of the most incredible experiences of my life.
Because here’s the big secret…discomfort is the doorway to destiny.
As a writer, I can tell you that every time I sit down to write one of these pieces, I am uncomfortable. Only once in the last 11 months of writing these pieces can I say that the words just flowed from my fingers with ease and enjoyment.
Most of the time I write in a state of frustration and feeling like I am trying to craft concepts from chaos, and find words in the wilderness. I obsess over content, context and syntax.
It isn’t easy, it isn’t fun, and it certainly isn’t comfortable.
For each of us, there comes a point where we have to accept that we are going to be uncomfortable for a while, and then continue in the pathway we have chosen. This is especially true when it comes to changing ourselves through a determined process of personal improvement.
Each step out of our comfort zone is by definition uncomfortable, but it can also be terrifying as we make changes to ourselves, our lives and our relationships.
For rarely are the changes that we really need to make easy, otherwise we would have made those changes already.
The hard stuff, the choices and changes that tear at your soul, and leave you concerned, nauseous and terrified are the ones that you probably need to make, but you’ll never do them if you cannot become comfortable with being uncomfortable.
I have faith that you can make these changes, and shine brighter in your true nature and radiance.
I’m here to help in any way that I can.
— Dr. Alan Barnes
@maddrbmusings